Gemma the human traffic cone...

Ok, so my ideal sunday evening didn't exactly work out. In fact, Monaco was a bit of a wash out really as far as Mclaren are concerned. Lewis started at the back of the grid after hitting the wall during qualifying, then Heikki failed to finish after...hitting the wall. Maybe I could qualify as an F1 driver under these circumstances. I've hit a wall, and that was one that was behind me, not like the 6ft concrete and tyre structures that are blindingly obvious to anyone looking in the right direction (in my defence, the one I hit was 2ft high, and in my blind spot, despite me looking backwards). However, I think mine was a tad cheaper to repair than Heikki's, but at least he doesn't have to pay for it!
However, at Brands this weekend, the Mclarens put on a much better show. James Humts 1976 Mclaren and Fittipaldis car put in a stunning performance, finishing second and third in the F1 race. These cars would have been racing at Brands when they were new, so it was nice to see them driving so well after 30 years.
There was a high quality of racing this weekend from all the cars on the track, but there was a certain amount of common sense lacking from some of the drivers, or one in particular anyway.
Note to drivers:
1. red and yellow flag means slippery surface, so don't drive so fast when there is copious amounts of oil on the track, you will spin off and create more mess and mechanic heartache, they don't have spares of everything you know.
2. If your cars engine has given up and retired, don't park it in the most dangerous spot on the track and expect me to go out there and push you all the way back to the pits. Thats what the 200 yards of grass you rolled past would have been good for. And don't complain about the grass, the green colouring would vastly improve on your current choice of colour; gold.
As it turned out, I only ended up pushing one car, and stopping another one from rolling down the hill whilst the tow truck attached itself to it. I was playing with flags the rest of the time.
Then I was given the job of "the human traffic cone". The plain sort, not the one with the flashing light on top. Someone had to run onto the track, waving a yellow flag and directing the traffic into the pitlane. Unfortunately, the call to do this came through when the cars were half was round the track. Being much younger and fitter than the 2 other marshals on post, I was "nominated" for the task. Its strange how vulnerable you feel standing in the middle of a track whilst the traffic passes by within 2ft of your shins. And of all the cars that went past, the last one to wave and acknowledge me was good old Sterling Moss. Google him if you don't know who that is.
Everyone made it into the pits, and I survived without being hit. Race control called through and said we did a good job. Who knows, maybe I would better suited standing in the middle of the M25, or the M6? I can add that to my CV now; hobbies - human traffic cone. maybe i'll get a light next time.
Overall it was a very good three days. Then I got to work today. Hmmmm....the jury is still out on whether it actually turned into a good day or not. It was very very busy, I was not in the best of moods because of this (and also half deaf due to the weekend), but, everything got sorted in the end with a little help from my friends (just please don't move my animals around, it confuses me!!). Don't get me wrong, I like it busy but it has to be an organised busy, not bank holiday chaos busy. Tomorrow will be organised, I know who I have where and their histories now!! It can only get better really, it has, I've got two weeks of this....

Hoping for some Mclaren magic....

I have been a little bit all over the place this week. I have been on different shifts at work for one reason or another (although maybe there should be a "paperwork" shift given the amount of filing I have done today from vets not emptying their paperwork trays, sorting lab reports etc). My poor little car had to go down to the garage AGAIN, this time to have a new fog light fitted, a stone broke the other one on the motorway. However, this trip was not so bad, given the amount of free coffee they were plying me with. In retrospect, drinking 5 cups of coffee in an hour is not a good thing; trying to take blood from a small puppy, with shaky hands, is not easy!
But, it has been a good week and today the build-up to the best race on the Grand Prix calendar started for me; Monaco. Unfortunately I will be at the race track for 3 days so will end up watching a recording, which means I have to avoid results on tv, radio, other people who love to remind me just how badly my beloved Mclarens are doing etc.
I love the Monaco race. Not just all the glitz and glamour of it (although I wouldn't mind one of the larger boats in the harbour to watch it from) but the circuit itself. It's all on the roads around the city and incredibly challenging. Given that its quite a slow circuit as well means that my little Mclarens might actually have a chance this weekend. Maybe Jenson Button will develop a case of vertigo where he will be unable to climb onto the top of the podium...again.
I really don't know what is going on with them. Last year we were the team to follow (on the track, into the gravel, into the wall etc), but this year we are showing everyone how not to do it. I know we like to race the Reds, but that doesn't mean we have to be going as slow as them! I'm sure the scale lego model Mclaren I have would go faster than they do (yes, I said lego, I really do have a set, 456 pieces to be exact, plus stickers and a steering wheel that moves). The team say its a lack of grip, due to a lack of downforce, and the KERS system is too heavy. (Translations available, free of charge). I say its a sneaky way of getting a good look at the diffuser on the Brawn car (or at the back of any of the other cars, they're all in front of us!), only problem is we can't keep up with them.

If a pokey little team like Brawn GP can win with a budget of 50p, a packet of crayons and a cereal box, then on a budget of x million pounds we should be able to build a car that is relatively competitive. We have wind tunnels, computer design software, so what is the problem? Unless that x million is being spent elsewhere...apparently floating duck islands are all the rage. Personally, I would attach this years car to such an island, sink it and start all over again.

This weekend (and monday) the cars I will be keeping an eye on at the track are old style Grand Prix F1 cars, with gear sticks and round steering wheels. No one was really bothered about aerodynamics then, no onboard computer changing fuel mixtures, it was all about getting your car across the line before anyone else did with pure driving skill. I hope to see plenty of that this weekend anyway.

So, if all goes to plan, on sunday evening I will be sitting down in front of the tv with one of the cats (Rusty loves to watch the racing, I'm sure she's a Mclaren fan too...) and I will finally see my team win this year, hopefully...

Here comes the weekend..

I have been meaning to write my next blog all week so I could update the world on my latest adventures at Brands Hatch, but just haven't got around to it. So, the "classic" cars at the weekend..some of them were all but classic. I'm not quite sure an old ford escort or sierra counts as classic yet. They were boy racers, with big engines, big exhausts which made a lot of noise and then expired after the first lap. Its quite entertaining seeing a car crawl past at 10mph with the driver banging on the steering wheel and bouncing up and down on the seat to make the car go faster. Whats even more entertaining (and also a little scary) is how oblivious some drivers are. On the first lap of the first practice session, there was a small collision on the corner near my post. Both cars pulled off the track, one with a bashed in bumper and the other one...with flames coming from the bottom of the car. He was on fire, big time. I've never had to deal with a fire on the track before, so it was quite exciting to think I would get a good experience here. I grabbed the fire extinguisher, only to see the car pull back onto the track and carry on driving!! Now, I would think that things would be getting a little smoky inside the car, or a least there would be the odd smell of something burning. Thankfully the car pulled off at the next post, about 100 yards up the track. He stopped because the oil light came on. Whilst one marshal put out the blaze, the others pointed him in the direction of his missing oil...300 yards of track behind him covered in it. The driver sauntered back to the garage, presumably to find his mechanic and a few bottles of oil so he could race again in the afternoon.
Meanwhile, there were 3 of us trying to clear up this huge oil slick. I was given a first day trainee to look after, who was also quite thrilled at seeing a car on fire. Together we trawled the track with brooms and cement dust. And that was about as exciting as it got for the whole weekend. There was a white car that entered every race, and only lasted for one lap of each race. Everytime it went past us the car spat out something..drive chain, exhaust pipe, wheel nut, I could have built a car by the end of the weekend if we'd been able to keep the bits, but the driver wanted them back each time.
But it was good to see that not all of the drivers are there to win, its just not possible for them with the cars they drive. There was a little Austin A40, which probaably had a top speed of about 35mph. Everytime he pootled past he would wave, flash his lights, anything to keep from counting how many times he had been lapped, but he was enjoying himself, and he was fun to watch. It's nice to be acknowledged by the drivers (apart from by the ones you've got into trouble), makes you feel appreciated.
Overall it was a good weekend, with good company and nice weather.
Work has been a lot better for me this week too. I've had a lot of laughs with people and quite enjoyed it, and feel that I'm back to my usual happy quiet self. Plus, I have a place on the diploma course I've been applying for. It should take around 2 years to finish, and I start in 3 weeks. I really appreciate the support that I have been offered at work, it means a lot to me and hope they realise what they have let themselves in for!! This could be a very long two years...

Back on track...

Yes, I'm back down the track again this weekend, something a little more sedate I hope, but putting the word "classic" in the title of the race meeting does not always necessarily mean slower. It can mean however that the drivers are likely to be the same age as the car, so the chances of an accident increases exponentially. How many times have you been stuck behind an "older driver" on the road, a few I bet. They do not drive like that on the track I can assure you, and this can make for more accidents.
But, hopefully this weekend will put me back on track in another sense. I have not been the most...cheerful person at work this week, for one reason or another. This can make me rather difficult to work with. I tend to cave in on myself if I have an issue, withdraw from everyone around me, store it all up. This is one new years resolution I have failed to keep; don't bottle it all up. maybe next year instead...
Yes, it was busy tuesday, when is it not after a bank holiday. Quite happy on wednesday. But, something happened on thursday, and I got all worked up about and and ended up blaming myself. The sensible part of my brain knows it was going to happen anyway, but the other half feels that my actions did not help the situation and I was entirely to blame. So, I wasn't exactly thrilled by the prospect of spending today at work. But, as it turned out, I had quite a good day today, the little kestrel that came home with me on thursday went to a rescue centre today, most of my patients went home, and nothing died.
So, from this moment, the past week is in the past, gone, nothing I can do about it so I need to stop beating myself up about what happened, enjoy my weekend at the track, then be back to my usual happy self on monday...(well, I think I'm usually happy anyway!! and funny..)
Oh yes, best wishes to Mrs Pumphrey and I hopes she makes a speedy recovery...

Marshal Law

I had a fantastic time at Brands Hatch at the weekend. I've made a lot of friends up there, and haven't seen many of them since before christmas so it was good to catch up with them, and get back into the swing of being a marshal. No longer the trainee I was last year, but a fully fledged track marshal, and what a way to start, with one of the biggest race meetings of the year, A1GP. If you don't know what that it is, its basically a form of single seater racing, where all of the cars are the same (none of this fancy double diffuser nonsense), and each car is driven by a different country. Whoever goes the fastest and finishes first wins, simple as. Plus all the support races that go along with it, which I won't list, I can already see people dozing off at the keyboard as they read this.
So, being a marshal basically entails ensuring the safety of the drivers and that everyone is following the rules. If only someone had told the drivers this, but onto that in a minute.
First challenge of the day, getting into the little marshals hut at post 6. You'd think one of the 8 of us would figure out how to open a stuck door. Track maintenence had a novel approach; a spade. wedge it in the right place and the door pops open, result!! Netx challenge, check the fire extinguishers, without setting them off. My fellow marshal Richard is very insistant that when he tipped it up, the pin " just fell out". I never realised that the powder in an extinguisher is pink, salmon pink really. by the time powder had stopped spraying everywhere, everywhere was salmon pink; the tyre wall, the inside of the hut, me etc.
Anyway, back to what we really do at the track; driver safety and rule obeying. anyone on here planning to try their hand at racing, please note:
1. You drive on the grey stuff (i.e tarmac), not the gravel or the grass. We tend to get a little house proud of our gravel traps, and we do not appreciate someone putting tyre tracks through the middle of it, it just won't look right afterwards.
2. If you do happen to fall off the track and into the above mentioned gravel, do not sit there and spin the back wheels, makes for a lot of dust and more mess for us to clear up. WE WILL NOT PUSH YOU. so don't even think of sitting there, flapping your arms about, it will not happen.
3. If we ask you to get out of the car, GET OUT OF THE CAR!!". It tends to be for a good reason, i.e your car is broken, time to go and apologise to your mechanics for the extra work you have created for them because, for one reason or another, you just didn't see that wall, despite the fact that you had managed to miss it during the previous 10 laps.
Ensuring driver safety also means that, if you have 2 cars come off at the same time, don't let the drivers beat the living daylights out of each other, no matter how tempting that may be.
And please, follow the rules, we will tell on you if you cut corners, barge other cars etc. Just play nicely.
So, we wave flags, tidy up after drivers who dump gravel, oil etc on the track, pick up bits of cars (hopefully just car bits, not the drivers as well), put out fires, tell race control who did what to who, remember car numbers and have a great deal of fun at the same time.
And I'm doing this every other weekend for the next 4-5 months...I love weekends!!
We ended up with a whole weekend of excellent racing from all the racing classes, thankfully no serious accidents, and well done to Ireland for winning the A1GP overall.